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Thursday, March 24, 2011
Smile :) @ 1:26 AM

It's no big deal actually.
what is done is all over.
i'm so glad,
as this day is already here,
& it won't stay for long.

i'm thankful that JessMinn has been by my side through that moment.
she was right beside me.
she saw my results first,
& i cried when i saw my results.
she was asking,
" are you crying out of joy, or are you too sad ? "
i didn't know what to reply.
now i know,
i cried,
because i didn't know what to feel.
i'm satisfied, but it won't satisfy the people around me.
so i cry.
i cry knowing that i'll be guilty for disappointing them.
this feeling,
is really tormenting me.
a lot of people feel that i have gone emotionally wrong,
feel that i am sad,
feel that i'm not okay.
thank all of you for caring so much.
i appreciate that a lot :)
so, i got my results.
i'm satisfied though it was not like what i've expected.
but still,
i'm happy because this is what i have worked for all this long.
probably,
probably if i just put in a bit more of effort,
i'll make the whole wide world happy.
i think everyone is quite disappointed,
especially my parents,
which is making me feeling so guilty.
& there's this issue at home,
but luckily it was well & fast solved.
thank You, Lord.

i'm not considering myself as one failure.
although it is unpleasant to a lot of people,
i'm not regretting,
because i know i could have done better.
God didn't bring me into this world to become a loser.
my parents didn't raise me to be a useless person.
it's just the matter of time,
& i felt the importance now.

thank You Lord so much for this big lesson.
i really can't thank You enough,
& show You my appreciation.
just thank You so much, my Lord :)

it wasn't my best shot.
the thought of studying just breaks off when i know i can't make it already.
i've learnt my lesson,
& i'm bound not to repeat it.
i can't believe,
it's all over already now :)

i love You Lord,
& i lift my voice
to worship You.
all my soul rejoice.
take joy my King
in what you hear,
let it be a sweet,
sweet sound in your ears.

jeszlynn.
credits : tumblr

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